On my weight loss journey, the weight loss motivation ran out about week 2.

I still lost 120 pounds, and I have been maintaining it for almost 6 years.

Sound Impossible?

I totally understand!  It took me until I was 42 to figure it out.  I spent a lifetime trying to lose and maintain 100 pound weight loss.

I lost 100 pounds the first time at 21 after being punchline in a very cruel joke.

My friend and I used to go to the NCO club to learn to country dance and play pool.

I learned to two step and three step… one of the best times of my life.  

UNTIL…

I had a crush on one of the guys there.  His friends found out and dared him to make friendly with the fat girl.

Let’s just say I found out after I kissed the boy… (Yes there’s a country song there…)

I used the anger and shame from that scenario to power through a 100 pound weight loss in the record time of 4 months.

Talk about MOTIVATED!  But it was not a healthy motivation and I will-powered my way through it… the weight came back!

I did this for a different reason at 31, but at 42 I knew I NEEDED to lose weight and I knew I needed tools besides weight loss motivation and Will-Power so it would be the last time, not just another time….

Why We Think We Need Weight Loss Motivation

We think we need motivation because we have been trained to believe that weight loss is 100% about eat less and move more until we hit our goal weight.

AND this just SUCKS!

This implies, we give up everything we enjoy and focus on that goal number.

But what happens when food is our companion, or food is what we use to make us feel better for a variety of reasons?

Well, this is when we go off the rails… and no amount of motivation is going to help us, unless of course we are 100 % focused on that number and our motivator is something big, like being the brunt of a cruel dare.

Let me just say, it’s not healthy to focus on that kind of anger and shame to lose any kind of weight, and it usually backfires because we end up hating on ourselves.

So let’s circle back, if weight loss isn’t all about eat less and move more and staying motivated to do these two things… What the heck is it about?

In reality weight loss when you have 100 or more pounds to lose is more about the daily habits we have and how we use food in our lives.

The Downfall to Relying on Weight Loss Motivation

Motivation is not a consistent flow, it’s more like a faucet where the flow is turned on and off by what’s going on around us.

Motivation is usually high in the beginning…. that beginning can be the start of the year (New Year’s Resolutions), the start of the month, week or day.

But it’s not going to stay consistent, and that is normal!

You are not broken or lazy because your motivation dies out over time!

There is an entire course on the psychology of motivation, and it’s an entire field of study.  The course bored the crap out of me. LOL 

But it did help me as I worked on my weight loss the 3rd time and I realized motivation wasn’t going to keep me going the whole time.

So the big downfall to relying on motivation is the fact that it’s naturally going to ebb and flow.

Where We Want to Rely on Weight Loss Motivation

So I have been really down playing motivation… but there are times we want to rely on it

Motivation is a tool to help us get started.  So yes we do need it, but the trick is using it as a springboard to bigger and better things.

The third and final time I lost 100+ pounds, I used my initial motivation to map out a plan for myself….

Guess what?

There wasn’t a list of foods I couldn’t eat, or a workout plan insight when I did this.

I focused on the small daily tasks that I could do that would help me get healthy.

Weight loss was my goal, but I knew if I focused on the number on that stupid scale it would send me into a tailspin.

A side note, I weighed daily through my weight loss and I still weight daily.  But I use it as one metric of how I’m doing. It does not define me as a person.

I created my own plan based on daily actions including, more water, getting rid of all the processed food I was eating and trying to move a little more.

The movement was not a big focus until much later because moving hurt really bad when I started.  But I did walk a lap around my house for each trip to the bathroom. And I didn’t ask my kids to get me stuff, I focused on getting up and getting it myself.  This was a lot for me in the beginning.

So motivation is the initial stepping stone so we create healthy habits to rely on.  These habits are the starting point to permanent weight loss. 

Let’s Close This Out…

I hear so often I’m just not motivated, or I lost my motivation and regained all my weight.

This is a major downfall to relying on motivation to lose 100 pounds.  Or really any weight at all.

Motivation isn’t going to flow like a river, it’s more like the rain, it comes and goes.

The goal is to use the motivation peaks to create small daily habits that we do that will lead to weight loss.  Habits are automatic, and they will support you when the motivation is gone.

Weight loss is one of the simplest and most difficult things in the world.  You want a simple weight loss plan, that’s why you clicked the link… 

But weight loss is the simplest plan because in theory we all know we need to eat less to lose weight.  And if we move more it helps.

I can tell you the first time a doctor put me on a weight loss plan I was 9.  There was a list of foods to eat, and he explained to eat these foods and move more…. 

Yeah…. that didn’t work, I was on that plan until I was 42 and faced with my 3rd round of 100 pound weight loss!

Sooo, how do we really lose weight and keep it off?

First off ignoring what the diet industry says is a good place to start. 😉

But really, I’m going to share ONE thing that is really over looked… how our perspective colors our weight loss!

A simple weight loss plan focuses on whole foods made with love… notice I didn’t say tasteless healthy food.  Because some of the most amazing foods, I’ve had were simple with good seasoning.

So the simple weight loss plan I’m sharing with you here is not about the food you eat or the workout you do in the gym.  Because come on, it’s eat less and move more…. 

We have all heard this a million times, but are you still trying to lose weight and riding the weight loss rollercoaster?

Let’s get started!

Simple Weight Loss Plan: Tip #1

Did you know how we see the world colors how we see ourselves?

This seems like an odd part of a weight loss plan I know!  But walk with me….

How many times have you started a diet, and life got in the way?

How many times have you started a diet and somebody said something to you, and you got pissed or hurt or…. and then all of a sudden you were eating yourself to death?

Not letting life and people get in the way of our health requires a perspective shift.

Letting others opinions or words affect how we react does nothing but hurt us in the long run.

I’ll be honest, this was a totally new concept to me 7 years ago!

I became aware of how I was viewing myself through the lense of others and allowing it throw my diet in toilet.

So the first tip is to start an awareness journal. How often are you allowing others words, looks or feeling affect your weight loss journey?

Simple Weight Loss Plan: Tip #2

Let’s talk about how we talk to ourselves.

The words we say to ourselves becomes our reality.  This is why a shift in perspective is important. Imagine for a minute this is what you constantly hear in your head…

• “I hate exercise!”
• “Losing weight is hard!”
• “I can’t lose weight!”
• “I’m always going to be fat, so why try?”

What do all of these have in common?

Everyone of these perspectives stops us from staying consistent.  They keep our mind in a place of walking up a 1000 mile hill.   It’s a choice to think this way.

“I don’t have any choices….”

This is soooo important!  

Remember, what you think about you bring about!  I have no idea where I heard that, but it is so true!

And the hokey thing is as I was losing weight the third time, everytime I heard these things in my head, I said to myself what you think about you bring about Michelle… remember “You get to change!”

And when I said “I hate vegetables!”  I said to myself, “Michelle, what you think about your bring about…” 

And I changed it to “I choose healthy.”

These little shifts in perspective and adjustment of the words in my head were key in my weight loss!

What are you going to choose?

Simple Weight Loss Plan: Tip #3

Did you know that a simple shift in perspective can help with self love?

As you are working on the words in your head, I bet you start catching yourself in the act of being mean to yourself.

I spent so many years punishing myself with food, and then later exercise… this is not the solution.  😉

There are no good or bad foods, and we are not good or bad for eating them.  But boy we sure punish ourselves.  

Changing your perspective can also include changing those words in your head that say nasty things about you!

As your changing how you think about people and situations also look into changing your perspective about the person you are vs the person you want to be.

If your looking in the mirror and saying nasty things to yourself, how do you think that perspective is affecting you?

Giving yourself kind words and grace and ending the hate fest is a step in a direction toward a simple weight loss plan.

Weight loss isn’t about eat less and move more, it’s about changing how you feel about yourself so your fueling your body with foods that make it feel good 85-90% of the time.

That other 10-15% enjoy foods that maybe a little less healthy but are enjoyable nonetheless.

When I realized this journey didn’t have to be an all-or-nothing trap, and I started making a plan and sticking to it, and shifting my perspective towards a healthy lifestyle.  That is when everything started to stick.

Let’s Close This Out…

I am a firm believer, and I am proof that after a lifetime of being overweight, you can change the stories in your head and shift your perspective.

For those of us that have always lived with the weight hanging on us it seems the journey is a little different.  

We don’t have any habits to fall back on, our mindset is in a different place and we have been beaten ourselves, our entire lives for our weight.  

This beating has come externally from the bullies that thought it was fun to pick on us, the doctors that thought they were helping by letting us know we needed to lose weight, often times our parents and their friends too.  

This beating has also come internally from us, we try and try and failure is often around the corner.  We are different than the person that put on weight later in life because it’s the only life we know.

All of this to say… it’s time to change your perspective and find new ways to see yourself and those around you. 

Now you are an adult. And this adult needs to nurture the child inside that is bruised and battered. Changing the words in your head is a nurturing process, and this process can lead to weight loss.  But more importantly it can also lead to healing.

If you are ready for support for this healing process, you can find that support in my Facebook Group.  Join us for a ton of fun, support and coaching opportunities to help you move forward on this journey.  

Sending you off with love and hugs!  

Growing up I longed for Christmas’s like I saw in the soap operas.  I was born the year that All My Children started.  

In my mind the traditions in the soap operas were so cool.  Their holidays included healthy holiday eating, but it wasn’t the center of the shows.  

My mom was an avid watcher from my birth.  LOL In my eye’s the glamorous Christmas’s with a little drama was exactly how Christmas should be.  

We had the drama without the glamour in our house.  It was the season of hurry up and wait.    

With 6 kids and a dad that procrastinated and mom that didn’t make a decision without him made the holidays challenging.  

Often times the Christmas tree went up Christmas Eve, but the junk food started before Thanksgiving and didn’t end until after Valentine’s day.  

This was the normal tradition in our house.  The only standard was lots of sugar from Thanksgiving until Valentine’s sometimes even Easter.  

When I started my 100 pound weight loss journey, I took small steps to create healthier holiday eating and standard traditions in my house.

So what is your holiday food story?

In the big picture often our current holiday eating patterns healthy or unhealthy usually stem from where we started.

Let’s take a look at three ways to make adjustments to what you’re doing now, versus how wonderful it could be with just a few tweaks and a focus shift.

We are going to look at three different tips, starting off with visualizing what you want your holiday to look like in an ideal world.

Then we look at how you can plan in a few holiday indulgences.

And finally we will look at how to treat ourselves when our healthy holiday eating plan doesn’t quite work like we want it too!

Healthy Holiday Eating Tip #1: Visualize What You Want from Your Holidays

It may sound dorky, but creating a healthy holiday eating plan can’t really happen unless you know what you actually want from the holidays.

When you sit and think of the holidays what do you picture as your “ideal holiday”?  This is the roadmap we are going to start with.

I’m pretty positive that heartburn, self recrimination for eating horribly and stomach pain aren’t part of your ideal picture. 

This was my before picture of the holidays… let’s find you a new after picture for the holidays.

Sit quietly with yourself and picture your ideal holiday, what activities, people and yes foods are there? (we will need this last piece in the next section on Plan your indulgences)

Now write out your top 3 people, activities and foods. This is your plan of attack!  Now your holiday focus becomes about including these.  If your focus is here, you can step away from those other things that give you heartburn and self recrimination.

Healthy Holiday Eating Tip #2: Plan Your Indulgences

Now that you have your holiday visualized the way you want it.  You can start with Healthy Holiday Eating Tip #2. You can plan your indulgences!

The holidays don’t have to be all about food.  The snacks in the break room, the food family insists that you just try, and all the stuff you see in the store, don’t have to go in you.

But I am willing to bet there are some foods during the holidays that you truly enjoy!  These are the things that kind of “make the holiday“.  The other stuff is just fluff.

I want you to know enjoying holiday treats is part of living!  It’s okay to enjoy foods.  I honestly thought that food was enemy # 1  for a lot of years.

As you plan out your holiday, and everyone brings “their” specials to you, remember it’s okay to say “No Thank You“.  

And when the little girl in your head starts pouting just remind her, it’s okay to want it, but it’s not on your list of planned indulgences this year.  🙂

This healthy holiday eating tip saved me a ton of calories.

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Healthy Holiday Eating Tip #3: Be Kind to You When You Slip…

The holidays are a quagmire of unhealthy choices.

So what happens when your “want for the treat”, out does your weight loss why?

This is really important!

It’s okay!  You don’t have to be perfect to lose weight and be healthy, and you don’t have to be perfect to maintain that loss!

But here is what you do need to do…

Don’t beat yourself up and use it as an excuse to go off the rails.

I am going to estimate that 90% of the weight gain from the holidays is in response to eating wrong once and then eating to make ourselves feel better…

Now that estimate is based on my journey… and expecting perfection.

My tip is simple:  When (not if) you slip, tell yourself it’s okay and step right back into your plan.

Focus on your success and not your slip ups and hug yourself daily.  Loving you regardless of shape, size or choices helps you move past the need for perfection.

Let’s Close This Out…

If you have made it this far, I’m pretty sure this post isn’t what you were expecting…

You were expecting an eat this not that type of post where I outlines all the stuff you should and shouldn’t eat…

Guess what?

This is how you stay in the diet circle instead of a healthy lifestyle that produces weight loss.

So I didn’t go there….

What I want you to know is that you can have that holiday season your visualized in step one, and you can have those special foods from step two, and if you slip up its okay… you can still be healthy and reach your goal! 

It’s about small consistent steps over the holiday.  Start today with your visualization.

One of the best things you can do for YOU is to involve yourself with a community that is working on similar goals for the holidays.

We are like the 5 people we spend the most time with, and when you spend time with other women striving to be healthy, healthy becomes your focus.

The Macros Done Right!™ Framework and the Accountability Tribe provide the community and the steps to balance hormones, bust cravings, break plateaus and get on track and stay there even over the holidays.

To lose weight over 40 and become that happy, healthy, active, hot, sexy woman, wife, mom and even grandma you want to be requires moderation not perfection.  And I help you design your happy life.

I know it often seems impossible but it’s NOT, I know you can do this!  

Sending you great big hugs & lots of love during this holiday season and always!

We all know the holidays add a little extra twist of fun, food and stress. And having health for the holidays feels like a pipe dream!

Before I started my journey to healthy, I also thought the holiday was a free for all on the junk.  So from mid October when I bought the trick-or-treat candy until mid January I went on a binge to end all binges.

I would steal all the Snickers from the bags of candy and eat several a day.  If a treat was offered I’d take one or two. The calories and the weight just piled on over the holidays.

Every night I would promise myself, tomorrow would be different.  It was a new day, and yet tomorrow was the same and I just kept eating. I didn’t feel like I had control! Health for the holidays was a pipe dream…

This was my story, is yours similar?

Once I started my 100 pound weight loss journey… what I like to call my journey to healthy, I took steps to change all this.

Now I started my journey on a Thursday in May. So I had several months to lead into this, but fear not!

All of the things I am going to share, you can implement right now to help you maintain or possibly even lose over the holidays and have your own health for the holidays.

My goal for you is for you to HAPPY HEALTHY HOLIDAY season, and that all starts this week!

(Be on the lookout for my program to help you do just that this year).?

Let’s cover 3 things I did to set myself up for success–so you can take what works for you!

Health for the Holidays Tip #1: Planned Indulgence

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​Probably one of the best things I ever did for myself was to decide to remove my all or nothing mentality for this season and in general!

There was a time where I thought perfection was required and the minute I went off “plan” even a little, it was over with.  I would binge for days.    I was stuck in a circle of hate.    

Unfortunately, this was complete with a double sided stomach ache.  One from the guilt of not living up to my standards, and then coming at me from the other side because of all the junk I was eating.

So how does a planned indulgence work?

There are a few ways to implement this, but I am going to share two.

Planned Indulgence Way One:

This method is done week by week.

Take a look at your week…  Is there something going on that has a treat you truly enjoy.  (Guess what it is OKAY to enjoy food! AND it’s okay to enjoy food that is decadent!)

Maybe you have a party at Aunt Sally’s house and you know she is making your favorite Chocolate Mousse’ pie.  This could be your planned indulgence for the week!

The idea is to take care of yourself for the week, enjoy the time with Aunt Sally and have a normal size portion of her amazing pie, this is still having health for the holidays!

Now there is no beating yourself up the next day because you went off plan.  Because you planned it! The next day you just return to normal.  And continue taking care of you!

Planned Indulgence Way Two:

This is the method I have always used to have health for the holiday….

I personally love our holiday traditions in my home.  The food part was spread out over October, November, December AND January.  LOL

So I took steps to trim it a lot.  But I kept our favorite parts and make them available on Thanksgiving, Christmas and New Years Eve day.  On these three days and only on these days, I don’t weigh my food.  And I don’t pay attention to my version of healthy.  On these days, I just enjoy our treats.

I take a few steps to make this possible…. I don’t buy or make anything in bulk.  Also, I only make and buy enough for the people attending on those days. (NO LEFT OVERS)

These steps allow me to , just say no when we attend parties or other activities during the season.  

For me, mentally when I go to these functions, I just remind myself of all the amazing stuff I get to enjoy on our family days.  This works for me.

Both ways of doing planned indulgences work!  They also keep the motivation high when you play little games with yourself.  ?

These games keep you on track with your health for the holidays because you have a reward at the end.  Not that I’m advocating food as a reward. 

But during the holiday season it’s all about presents and giving.  So give yourself the gift of enjoying the holiday season, and learn how to enjoy it without just food.

Health for the Holidays Tip #2: Add a Movement Habit or Keep Your Existing One

If you have an existing movement or exercise routine, don’t give it up during this season!  This is really important in your quest for health for the holidays.  

Make sure you make this a non-negotiable in your life.

The stress of the holidays can make us a little more emotional than usual and movement is a great stress reliever.  

I don’t care if your movement is walking your house, outdoors or the mall… keep moving(or start–little bits at a time)!

If going to the gym is your thing,(Yay sister) then make the trip to the gym… or in my case to my basement.  

I am known for my 4:30 am workouts.  If you do it early there is no excuse.

Movement doesn’t have to be something you hate.  Try dancing with kids or grandkids to some holiday favorites.  🙂 Anything to get the blood pumping and bring a smile to your face.

Health for the Holidays Tip #3:  Take The Time To Meal Plan

The final tip for your health for the holidays… and I bet you guys are starting to think I am a broken record!  But Plan your meals!

The holidays are not a time to slack on your planning!  Planning actually gives you flexibility.

During this season, I keep some staples in my house at all times that I can resort to that are quick and easy.  Just in case the family decides to do fast food or take out. It happens, but I don’t want to fall back on these… first off it makes me sick.  Second it takes my power away.

Overall, if you plan the meals and do crock pot meals there is no reason for anyone to resort to take out… unless they want to. ?

So take the time to plan.  30 minutes of planning saves hours of frustration and a ton of money.

Let’s Close This Out…

The journey to healthy, and having health for the holidays, and reaching your 100 pound weight loss goal, does NOT mean giving up all your favorites!

It does mean learning a little restraint, and enjoying a single portions and planning your treats.

If you make a plan for your indulgences, keep moving and plan your meals over the holidays… your on a path to success in your journey.

And if you are in need of support over the holidays, make sure you jump into the Facebook Group filled with supportive women that also have 100 pounds to lose, or they are somewhere on that journey.  We would love to have you!

When I weighed 286 pounds life happened to me…  

I didn’t feel like I had a choice in anything and my world was full of “Have to’s…”  Everything from “I have to get up today”, to “I have to make dinner for my family”, and “I have to go to work”. 

All of these “have to’s” led to me feeling completely powerless, and like I didn’t have a choice in anything.  

This powerless feeling included, my inability to lose the weight that caused me to hurt both physically and mentally.  Let’s talk about 3 changes to mindset that allow for A Healthy Lifestyle Change…

A Healthy Lifestyle Change 1: I Changed My Perspective

One day I came out of the fog just a little and realized just how miserable I had become.  Not only internally, but I just wasn’t living a joyful life.  

There is a long story, but for 8 years they told us we couldn’t have anymore children, and we proved them wrong… with 2 more 16.5 months apart. 

I was blessed, but boy let me tell you everything I did for my family felt like a dredge on my life.

Let me assure you, I loved and love my family with all my heart.  But I sure wasn’t acting like it.  And I wasn’t enjoying their young years like I had wanted to when I dreamed of more kids.

This misery was all because I was so big, and I hurt sooo bad. Every task felt big and overwhelming and I had very little energy.  My negativity was helping to suck the energy out of me.

To change this, I changed my perspective.  Every time I felt those nasty thoughts creep in, I took myself back mentally where I had so desperately wanted more babies.

I found gratitude for all the little wants and needs of my children and my dear hubby.  All they wanted from me was help and love.

This mental switch although small helped me as I began my weight loss journey too, because I knew how badly I wanted those babe’s for 8 years… and I knew I really wanted to enjoy raising them and participate in their lives.

So what switch in perspective do you need to make?  This switch does help with the weight loss journey.  😉

A Healthy Lifestyle Change 2: Swap “I have to” with “I get to…”

So as I began feeling grateful again for the amazing family I had, I needed a little more mental word fuel to keep me moving forward toward a healthy lifestyle.

You would be amazed at the difference 1 little word can have on your mindset and world view in general.

There were many years where I was stuck in the “I have to” mindset.  This made everything feel like a great big old chore.

To ditch the feeling everything was a chore, I began making a conscious effort to say to myself and out loud… I get to do “this” today.

This worked with everything from I get to go grocery shopping, to I get to make the bed.  This really does make a huge difference on how you feel about the activity.  

“I have to…” is forced and required.  “I get to…“, is a choice and implies fun and it empowers you.

So try switching out “I have to…” with “I get to…” for a few days and see how YOU feel!

A Healthy Lifestyle Change 3: Empower yourself with-“I choose…”

The mindset trick I used to empower A Healthy Lifestyle change was to implement the totally empowering two little words….   I CHOOSE…

This is one of my favorites… I still use all of these daily fyi…   

So when I start to feel like I want that bag of chips, (darn those corn chips in my cabinet this week), or a candy bar from the box of fundraiser candy bars traveling my house… I CHOOSE HEALTHY is my mantra…

I was put on my first diet at the age of 9…   Someone (either myself or others) have been controlling my food for so many years… and I am a rebel at heart.  

Big secret here… I HATE being controlled!  I would often just have what I wanted to say screw it.  In some odd sense it empowered me because I was doing the opposite of being controlled…  Soooo….. I now empower myself with Choice!

Knowing I have the power of choice on my side, gives me a sense of inner peace.   

So when faced with a food CHOICE how do you choose?  Try adding choice to your day and see how it works for you….

Let’s Close This Out…

These are my 3 favorite mindset tricks that helped me lose 120 pounds and achieve a healthy lifestyle for the first time in my life. 

They are all stories in my head that I changed to give myself the power to see the possibility of losing weight.

I didn’t lose my 120 pounds in a short period of time. Primarily because I have done that before… I lost the weight to gain it all back again in a very short period of time twice before this.

Changing my mindset, I believe is the reason I have maintained my weight loss for 5 years.

How can you do some word play with yourself?

So let’s do a little review:

To create a healthy lifestyle change:

• Changed Your Perspective
• Swap “I have to” with “I get to…”
• Empower yourself with-“I choose…”

Each of these mindset “tricks” will allow you to take your power back and lose the weight on your terms… not fast, just steady and keep it off…

Are you ready to start making small changes over time?  If you are, I would love to have you in my private facebook group.  I help smart, successful women over 40 lose 100 or more pounds with consistency and confidence so you can stop observing life, get out of pain & start living a life you love, in a body that gives you joy.